W.I.T.T.Y.

A friend recently asked about a devotional I had used, and I tried to remember one that I used on here.  So I began looking, and I had actually packed up the book and brought it here, Voices of the Faithful, inspiring stories of courage from Christians serving around the world.  So I had the book out, and flipping through it, Thank you Jesus for your reminding  me to put this in our packed bags.

Anyway, I came across a day that I had underlined, and so I reread it, and boy was the timing perfect.

The title of the page is

W.I.T.T.Y

"when Peter saw him, he asked, "Lord, what about him?" Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you?  You must follow me"" John 21:21-22

The devotional says to write out WITTY in the margins, meaning: (What is that to you?)

It is so human, and super easy to compare ourselves to those around us, instead of focusing on what he has for us, the road he mapped out specifically for us.  

I am going to quote the book from here, because it was perfect.  .  .

God says, FOLLOW ME.  But instead of looking to the Lord.  I sometimes look to the situations and qualities of others.  I use the excuses, "lord, they speak the language better. . . Lord, they are more outgoing than I am . . . Lord, they have more friends than I do. . . Lord, they are having an easier term than I am.  "taking my eyes off God's purpose for me and placing my eyes on someones else's life shows lack of contentment.

You must follow Me.  He does not say if I want to or if it easy;  He says I must follow Him.  God made me the way He did for a purpose.  I am the only one who can follow God the way I can.  You are the only one who can follow God the way you can.  We must follow Him, and we must be content with our role while doing it.  

Now don't think this was written just for missionaries, because it isn't, when I wasn't on the field, I had thoughts like, "Lord they don't understand, they don't have to work night shift, or They have no idea what is like having a hard time getting pregnant, or they have no idea the struggles I am facing, or it is so easy for them to start an IV (remember I am a nurse).

So wherever you find your self, you can find yourself taking your eyes off the Lord.
Where we are in Costa Rica, we are at language school with other rookie missionaries who are in the same place we are.  We are all trying to learn Spanish, we all just came off itineration, we are all giving up our family, friends, and home to answer a call that is greater than we are.

So it is sometimes hard to not look around.  I confess, I am guilty.  I get frustrated when every one around me can roll their R's and I can't, or when they understand reflexive pronouns, and I have no clue what is going on.  I need to remember WITTY.  What is it that to me.  God has a path just for me, one that they are not walking.  Their road, wether it be in Costa Rica, Gastonia, Folsom, or Lusk Wyoming, has been mapped out just for them.

Lord please don't find me with my eyes on my neighbor, discontent with the plan you have for me.  Please keep me from comparing myself to those around me, either at home or on the mission field.

Lord please teach me to be content in who I am in You.



(imagine a really peaceful picture here, but after 2 days of slow internet, forget it :))

I call dibs on that!

We only have 3 more days of class, and I can not find the motivation I need to study. . .

Dave is out with some friends, the girls are fast asleep, and I am trying to understand the differences between saber and conocer, (um hello) but my brain has checked out. . .

So I am reflecting tonight. . .

We have been in our house for a little over a week now, and we are starting to feel like this is home.

Last night, Emma said something to me, that got me thinking. . .

and since I have the time, I thought I would share.

She came up to me, and said,

"mama, I call dibs on the placemats!"

With a thousand and one things running through my head, I was confused.

So I said, "clarify please Emma"

And she said, "when you die, I want the placemats"

What a strange comment, I was thinking. . .

and then I got all teary. . .

Because, during itineration people would ask, "well what are you going to take?" "how many suitcases will you take" etc.

And it was hard, we packed 20 bags, and we each brought a carry on.  So how do you decide what is the most important things to you, things that you will be ok if they are packed up for the next 3 years, and you won't see again, what do you save, what do you throw away, what is so special that it makes it into the 20 precious bags.

This was very hard for me, I gave the girls a lot of leeway, they brought things that I don't think they will ever play with or use.  We left power tools behind and packed my little ponies, thats how important the girls transition was to us.

And now back to Emma's comment.  To me, she wasn't just saying, "I want your placemats when you die" She was saying, "Mama, I love that we have a placemat for every season, when I am old, and have girls of my own (because she doesn't want boys) I want to make my home special and pull out these placemats to remind me of growing up.  Mama, thank you, for taking the space out of the 20 suitcases for these placemats, you made a good decision. "

"Mama, you made this house my home, and I love it."

And that my friends, made my day.
and now I am teary again.

Thankful

I can't believe how fast time is going!

So sorry it has been so long since we have updated.

Our time seems to evaporate here.

So let me try to  update everyone!

Maggi is doing really well in 6th grade.  She has made some great friends at school, for which we are so THANKFUL.  This has been a direct answer to prayer, as many of you know.  She is our very quiet girl, who through itineration and visiting churches, has learned to shine for Jesus, and learned to dream big and take risks to achieve great things.  We went to visit with a team that was working on a church, and Maggi was not going to be happy until she was able to actually work.  We looked over and she was helping carry cinder blocks from the pile to where the workers needed them.  We are very thankful for her quiet determination, her heart of prayer, and how she quietly longs to please our Lord.

Emma, is still going strong.  She is in 3rd grade, and is always chatting and talking.  She is also adapting really well.  She continues to surprise us with her vocabulary in English and Spanish.  Emma is very tall, and with her blue eyes, dimples, freckles, and love of BIG headbands/hairbows, she tends to draw attention to our family.  She loves to be the center of attention.  We know that our Father has big things in store for our little girl who has all the confidence, courage, and faith that it takes to move mountains. We THANK the Lord for this sweet girl

Since we have been here, we have been busy.  

We obtained and submitted our complete packet for our residency visas.  This required many steps and trips to various official buildings here in San Jose.  To give some examples, we had to go bring documents from 3 states in the US with us, we had to have background checks here and the US, we needed to be fingerprinted for interpol, we had to register with the US embassy here, and other random documents, all of this needed to be submitted within our first 90 days in Costa Rica.  If we didn't obtain our necessary paperwork, we are required to leave the country every 90 days to maintain legal visas.  We won't actually receive our residencies for several months (or maybe even 18 months) but, we are very excited to have all of that paperwork submitted.   

Can I hear an amen!

BEYOND THANKFUL

We have also been house hunting.  This is not as much fun as the show on HGTV.  Trust me on this.  The girls became weary of the house hunt.  But we finally found something that we are excited about making our home.  This was another direct answer to prayer.  We feel that we had the favor of the Lord on this big decision.  Our landlord lowered the price by $700 a month for us.

AMAZING

The girls had been praying for specific things (unknown to their parents) and other than having a bathtub, meet every one of the secret desires of their hearts.  

OH HOW HE LOVES US!

  

(one of the things on the list was having a toilet that we can flush the toilet paper, instead of putting it in the wastebasket)

I really need an amen on this one

We have managed to shop for our furniture, all the while learning about the culture here.

For instance, if you see something you want, you should most likely purchase those things immediately.  

We learned this the hard way, who knew that within 5 days, the sofa and chairs I had picked out would sell out in 3 different stores.  We shopped from people leaving the country, from Craigslist Costa Rica (who knew), and from fellow missionaries.  Our move in date is next Friday!  We all thrilled to finally be settled.  In the past 18 months we will have moved 6 times.   The landlord allowed the girls to pick out their paint colors, and we are finding ways to make each room special.  We will show pictures as soon as we get settled.  Emma's bed had to be ordered (again, who knew they sell things so quickly), so it may takes us a while for the big picture for her, but we will show you soon!

And we will be receiving our Speed the Light car soon.  

Merry Christmas to us!

We are actually buying a STL car from other missionaries, to help keep cost down for our first term.

We have done all of this while still attending language school!  

This is no small thing, let me assure you. 

We attend classes Monday through Friday, and have done countless hours of homework, written papers, done lessons on the computer, etc, and then used our baby level language in the police station, with the lawyers helping us with visas, in the grocery store, in the court house, to the taxi drivers, to the salesclerks, to the security guards. . . Because of our adventures outside the classroom we have learned many new vocabulary words 

(fingerprints for example)

And since arriving we have experienced many tremors 

(or as I like to call them. . . EARTHQUAKES)

I will never ever ever get used to that.

We have survived rainy season

and even go to take a trip to the mountain to let off some steam

(actually the mountain let the steam off)

Put we exchanged our annual fall trip, to Volcan Arenal, and really enjoyed getting out of the city.

So I think that catches us up.  The first trimester (as we call it in school) has been all about setting up house, and getting settled.  Our BIG goal is to be completely settled by Christmas.  With a little help from our friends, we think that is almost a reality.  (we have people sending us some packages with shower curtains from South Carolina, a friend from Connecticut bringing a suitcase of supplies on a business trip here, and a friend's nephew from Texas bringing some of our favorite supplies from the states, and of course Nanny bringing some suitcases full of small appliances from our friends in the Northern California Nevada district).  

(it takes a village right)

All that being said, we are ready to meet our National Church friends, scope the field for ministry opportunities, and find our niche here in the country.  We feel we are at a huge advantage to be able to do this our first year, many of our friends at language school will have to do this after they arrive on the field.  We had the option of staying at CINCEL (language school) for the entire year, but we were ready to be settled.  We have visited many churches here, and are starting to meet the presbytery, and executive members.  We feel that this is such an awesome way to ease into a new life.  

So please be in continued prayer for us in the following:

that we begin to see the right ministry for our family

that we will walk in the favor of the Lord 

that we all remain healthy(we have all been on antibiotics since being here)

that the girls continue to THRIVE and begin to feel rooted here

for language acquisition

that our house becomes our home and is a safe shelter for the family

That we are able to make relationships with the Local church despite the language barrier

pray for our families back in the states specifically for their health

for our finanical needs to be continuously met

Maggi asked that you join her in prayer for friends at school begin to know Jesus in a real way

Here in Costa Rica, after the rainy season, the Christmas winds come to dry things up.  

And so it is for the Cartwright family, another season is closing, and the winds of change are upon us again.  And we are thankful for so many things.  We are thankful to be here in Costa Rica, after a life long calling.  We are thankful to have a body of supports who give to us out of sacrifice, that are sowing seeds here in Costa Rica.  We are thankful to have friends who pray without ceasing for us.  The emails, the facebook messages, and phone calls just to let us know you were praying for us, humble us, and often brings us to tears, who are we that you would call out on our behalf? We are thankful for friends all over the nation, and now the nations.  You have supported us through a very difficult last 18 months, and now many have become our missionary family.  We are thankful for our family, leaving them in the US was the most difficult thing we faced in itineration (surprising that it wasn't the raising of the budget).  We are thankful to be on this amazing journey.

Thank You!

HOLA!

Hola (hello)

We have now been here for 3 weeks, and are finally getting into a bit of a grove. 

Here is how our days have shaped up. . .

I get up at 5:00, for a number of reasons

          *the sun rises about 5:30 so I should go ahead and get a jump start
          * I need some alone time with the Lord, and this is just about the only way I can get it
          * When three girls share a bathroom, I need all the extra time I can get

by 5:45 I am ready to wake up the girls and get them going (the night before they lay out their clothes, we have their lunch packed, bookbags and raincoats ready to go).

6:00 we are all ready to eat some breakfast

6:25 we are all out the door

We arrive to our school at 6:50 so that the girls can ride the school bus to their school, Sojourn.

Now Dave and I have to wait an hour before our school starts, so this is where Dave often reads and prayers, I lay my seat back and snooze, or we go have breakfast with our fellow Missionaries in their home. 

Then Dave and I have language school, and the girls are at their school.  They return to us close to 3:00, and we venture back to our house we are staying at for one more week. 

We get homework for the girls started, and then dinner started, and then the girls have a little down time, baths, and then in to bed by 8:00. 

That is when Dave and I start our homework. 

Crazy, our lives went to pretty loose schedules except on the weekends and Wed, to very strict and time conscious schedules. 

Things will change next week when we are in our new apartment.  We hope to be more settled, and less like we are camping then.  During the next 2 1/2 months we hope to find a new place to live and shop for our furniture, so that we will be ready to celebrate Christmas in our New home.  Here in Costa Rica there is no Halloween or Thanksgiving, so they already have their Christmas decorations out.  That is super crazy, but since I love Christmas, the only think stopping me from putting up my tree in October, is that I would have to move it :(

SO I WILL Wait.

But we have been busy here.  We celebrated Costa Rica's Independence day.  We had a lot of fun, making our faroles (lanterns).  At 6:00 on Sept 14, everyone steps outside and sings the National Anthem, and the children light their faroles to remember when they came through the streets declaring that Independence had been won.  So the girls were in a parade at their school.

We had open house night at the girls school as well, and it was fun to check out their classrooms and meet their teachers.

 For me, I most enjoyed seeing a set of enclyopedias in Maggi's classroom.  Now those were the good ole days.

We are learning to grocery shop here, and aside from sticker shock on how much things cost, we are having fun with the new products they have (chicky's, yippys, mammo chinos (actually that is a fruit but it is still fun).  About the sticker shock, I noticed that they had that scanner (thing that they put on electronics in the states, the thing that they have to wave over a pad to demagnetize it or whatever) on CHEESE.   It's that bad people. 

All that to say, we are adjusting.

The girls are doing really well.  I am not just saying that so the grandparents will be happy.  But they are sincerely legitimately happy.  I keep waiting for them to show signs of culture shock.  But so far, nothing.  Emma and Maggi both love saying their simple prayers in Spanish now (and thanks to them I impressed my teacher in my class when I offered to pray).  They love looking at the things in the produce isle, observing all they can in the car, etc. they are soaking it all in. 

And for that I am grateful.  That is not an accident.  I know it is because people from all over the country have prayed for them, prayed for protection, prayed for them to make friends, to enjoy school, to pick up on the language fast.  Countless prayers have gone up on their behalf.  And because of it I am amazed. 
and grateful

David and I doing well, maybe not as good as Maggi and Emma, but we are hanging in there.  When you become physically exhausted, it wears on your emotions, that combined with the immense job of learning a language, I felt saturated with it all last week.  So when my Spanish teacher (who speaks no English) asked me where my parents were, I, in my broken Spanish, told her my dad was in the US.  Then she asked me where my mom was, and I in my very little Spanish, not knowing many words, said "Con Dios"  which meant, she is with God, but I couldn't say it without tears flowing down my cheeks.  So of course there I am, crying in class before it even gets tough. 

But my Father is faithful, He is building us up, and has proven faithful time and time again. 

We are in awe of His goodness over us. 

And while we may be at a loss for words sometimes (because we don't know them in Spanish, or because there is no way to articulate something) we are so incredibly happy to be here. . .

in Costa Rica

serving Him

We Are Here!

We Can Not Believe we are actually Here, in the beautiful country of Costa Rica.

It has been a long journey!

When we completed our application in October of 2009, we had no idea where we would end up, or when.

But we landed on Sept. 5, 2012 in San Jose, Costa RIca.

We have been in the process of moving and saying goodbyes since July of 2011, so we all felt like we were finally ready to be here.

We had 20 checked bags (11 footlockers and 3 suitcases and 6 duffle bags). We each carried a small suitcase on the plane, and each had a back pack. We looked like the Beverly Hill Billies. But we did it.

We all got to bring a little of what we felt like we couldn't live without. For Dave it was some fishing stuff, for me it was a little from each American Holiday to decorate the house, For Maggi it was books and stuffed animals, and for Emma. . . well she brought a small village of my little ponnyville ponies and accessories. This was our first time, so we had asked a variety of people what they would bring, and we adapted it to our family.

We landed on the day that Costa Rica had a major earthquake, but the quake did minimal damage to the country, and did not delay our arrival at all.

We left Sacramento in the morning, and had a connecting flight in Dallas. While waiting for our flight to San Jose, we ran into other missionaries headed to San Jose to start their time at Cincel. I am going to have to say, the kids were all so excited to be there.

We then arrived and cruised through immigration, and the only hiccup, was that Maggi and Emma had made passports for their American Girl dolls, in hopes that they could get them stamped with them upon entry in to the country. However the agent wouldn't stamp them. They were slightly disappointed. Then we picked up all of our bags, and then went through customs without any problems.

We had Don, the director of Cincel meet us, as well as one of our fellow missionaries, Josh. It was so nice to be welcomed home. Josh took us to our apartment where they had stocked us up on some snacks, breakfast and lunch for the next day. It was such a thoughtful gesture.

The girls got up bright and early the next day to start their first day of school. I can honestly say that they were so excited. They were ready to begin. Such an answer to not only our prayers, but the prayers of so many. It was a little akward leaving them there at their school, and then going back to ours.

Then Dave and I went to start our first day of school. We took our entrance interviews, to help decide what class we should be placed in. Then we went to do a little grocery shopping, etc.

We were in a very Costa Rican apartment off campus, however, it needed a little maintance, so it was decided that we would wait till an apartment closer to campus became available at the beginning of October, and that would better suit our needs. So in the mean time, we are able to stay in a fellow missionaries home, while they are away.

Our grand plan, is to be in the little apartment until December, and in the meantime look for our house that we will stay in for the remainder of our time at Cincel, and our first full term. So please be in prayer that the right home would be available to us.

So, we are still mostly living out of suitcases, which is a tad stressful, because we go to look for something, and can't easily find it, but, we are managing just fine.


So all of that being said, we are adjusting.

We are still in a state of being overwhelmed that we are finally here. We are so grateful for everyones prayers, sacraficial giving, their generous gifts to our children, the act of friendship bestowed upon us. . . all of it.

We know that we are not here because of one church or one district. We are here because we serve a Father who taught the Cartwright family that He provides in His time a perfect plan designed just for us.

I wish I could tell you of each miracle that got us here, but the truth is I don't know. Often times a family would give us what they could, making a sacrifice so that we could go where we were called to go. I don't know who they all were, they willing placed their offering in the plate as it went by. But we pray for them, as a family we pray that God would pour in not only money, but health and safety on them. We had a family that left the service, went home and got clothes to put on our backs for the bitter midwest winter. We had the South Carolina District provide a large donation to help us actually get to the field, and provide money so that we could bring our excess baggage. Norcal Nevada has provided finical funds to help with our arrival also, but then women provided money to help us set up our household goods, and a store we could shop in before we left. The NPLAD provided us our last push to get here, and the SC Hispanic district wanted to be a part of the Cartwright family in Costa Rica, and are mixed in the support base as well.

We feel like we are a quilt, with different swatches from all over, woven together to make something beautiful.

"Thank you" seems like a small way to say how we feel.



We are overwhelmed with gratitude, ready to serve, anxious to hear Our Father be specific in each detail in our lives.

How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity! Psam 133:1

thus far and empty jars

My thoughts are scattered, but I need to type them out, so they become real, so I don't forgtet.

I am not sure where to start.

So. . .
I 'll start from last week. We were feeling pretty beat up, just the weariness of constant travel, the stress of itineration, the calender with the start of language school looming over us, and the finicial deficiet of our itineration. It was a heavy burden. One that we weren't even asked to carry.

Somehow we thought we were in charge of our budget, our calender, the timing of it all.

On our schedule was a district council (which is where their are a large number of churches come together for prayer, meetings, business, and services). There was one last week and this weekend.


So we were praying that between the 2 district councils, and making a last run around the state, we would be able to get to Costa Rica by September. Even if our budget was below where it needed to be

We were praying for a miracle.

And honestly, my faith was very weak. I felt that I had been praying for several miracles the past year, only to have them seemingly go unanswered.

We have some friends, Louis and Lourdes, who had recently received a miracle in their budget, and encouraged us to believe for our miracle. They said that they would stand with us in prayer in fasting for 2 days before the district council. Louis was coming to attend the District meetings, and he and Dave were preparing to tag team and hit the meetigs hard, making friends, and creating partners along the way.

Louis felt that the Lord had given him a message for us, it was II Kings 4:1-7. He told us to fill out blank pledge forms, and that just as the Lord filled the widow's oil, He would bring in our pledges. Our friends believed that by the end of the weekend, our budget would be met. Our jars so to speak, were our pledge forms, and that God was going to have them overflow.

Their enthusiasm was unreal. We blamed it on them just having received their miracle (and them being Latino :))

We were so tired, we weak, so scared to believe such a thing could happen.

But we prayed, and fasted, and filled out empty pledge forms.

So there were our empty jars.

Dave and Louis were scheduled to go to the district together. They left for the conference on Friday.

The day they left, I was praying, and reading my Bible. For several years now, as I read, I will date the Scripture, and jot a note. I have been doing the Live Dead Journel, a 30 day challenge of prayer for unreached peoples, particularly in Africa. It also encourages to write in your Bible, doodle, scribble down thoughts and prayers.

So in my Bible, in Exodus 16 (the story of manna and quail), I have a very bad doodle of an empty mason jar. My notes say. . .

Fasting and believing for miracles 7/12
"I will know it was the Lord who provided for my needs."
"Take and keep (this empty jar) for generations to come so they can see the miracle"

In my prayer journal, I wrote, I believe Lord, but just as another has prayed, "Lord help my unbelief"

They left on Friday.

Dave's text message were short, but are as follows:

Friday
*pray Amy, they have changed the schedule they wouuld like us to address the district tonight instead of tomorrow

*We had 4 people take pledge forms

*I went to take a picture with Matthew Barnett (from the LA dream center), and he wanted a pledge form, he wants to support us, WHAT?
(He sent me the picture of his business card as proof)

Saturday

7:58 am *Good morning Beautiful (thats me :)Today is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it. I anticipate God making us feel small and silly today for our worry and doubt. We will see the hand of God move mountains from before us and we will rejoice in His loving kindness and faithfulness in all things. We will give Him alone the glory for He is good and worthy to be praised despite any circumstance we may face. So be greatly encouraged in the Lord today no matter what, because He surely loves us and has us wrapped in the palm of His hand.

12:06 p.m. the mission's banquet is starting, pray again

1:57 p.m. We just got at least $700 in pledges, maybe more. Praise Jesus

8:32 p.m. We just got $800 more in pledges babe (thats me again ;) God did it in 1 day! I don't have words.

there were more texts but those are private. . .Ahem. . . .

Sunday
7:54 For some reason things seem so much brighter today followed by a picture of the pledges spread over the bed ( I needed proof)


we are left speechless.

We are so small.

We had received the remaining $1500 in monthly commitments in one weekend. Exactly our need.

How could we doubt that Our Father had a plan, planned just for us, that would display His care and love in only the way a Father who longs for His children to be cared for in.

We were so humbled.

Things are still very unofficial, but today is Tuesday, and the girls and I have started packing.

We had been told earlier, that the journey would be difficult, and that somewhere along the way, it would be lonely, and that you would have to take something as part of your testimony, something that would help you remember the place he brought us from.

so for us, I will be taking an empty jar. to Costa Rica. On September 5th.



"then you will know that I am the Lord your God" Exodus 16:11

I couldn't find the words

The last few weeks have been hard for the family.
I could never find the best way to articulate my feelings, struggles, and deepest prayers.

After a rough family event last night, David started typing. . .

And this time I couldn't find the words, But Dave did.

How do you stand when you don’t even know where to stand? When pursuing what it is you believe God would have you do seems to contradict what you understand it means to love and protect your family. When you no longer feel as if you are accomplishing either, what do you do? You feel like a failure, for one. You feel very alone for another. You know that God is concerned more about you, more about your family, than He is concerned with what you do. You know that He promises to provide in every area of your life no matter the circumstances, but in this place you can’t see it. You know that He has created you to love Him first of all, but also he has equipped you to do something as well. He expects all of us to do the something he has equipped and called us to do. It has to flow out of our relationship with him, but none the less we are accountable to the calling and talents he places in our lives. The first thing He has called us to do outside of our relationship with Him is to love our spouse more than any other human being. He calls us to prefer them over anyone, to love them unconditionally and protect them. Second he calls us to love our children He blesses us with. To protect them, provide for them and to raise them up to know and love God. But then He calls us to love this world. He calls us to live our lives in such a way before them that we are able to draw others to Him. He calls us to give up our lives as He gave up his to love the world and draw them back into relationship with their heavenly father. So where are we left when this calling to love our family and our call to love the world seem to be in conflict?
All I know to do is give myself over to Him completely and say “God I am completely incapable of accomplishing anything without you.” I cannot love my wife like she needs to be loved, I cannot love my kids or raise them the way they need to be. I certainly cannot love a world that does not love me in such a way as to reveal anything but my faults and failures. So I acknowledge that only God can accomplish those things in me. I ask that He would give me the ability to effectively love my wife and children unconditionally, protect and provide for them. Secondly that he would give me the opportunity to effectively accomplish His calling in my life to be used to reach a lost world.
Lord in this place this is my prayer. “Forgive me for thinking I am in anyway able to accomplish a life lived for you under my own strength. Forgive me for how that has been revealed in a less than intimate relationship with you. Forgive me for how that has affected my wife and children. Forgive me for taking the call to love the world and viewing it through my own ability and suspect talents. Lord I once again take the place as a worshiper, disciple, student, child. I say Lord, have your way in my life through your understanding, your plan, your will, not mine. I ask that you work through my life to help me love you and relate to you in an intimate and genuine relationship. That through that relationship you enable me to effectively and passionately love my wife, to raise my children with deep love and affection to help them to love you and see them become all you have designed. Also I ask that you help me to be in this world for you what you have created me to be. Help me to trust you each day to provide the desire, the opportunity and the ability to accomplish your will. Help me to place my confidence in your provision, to hear your voice and to walk boldly in your presence. Lord I am lost and empty without you in this place of confusion and uncertainty. Hold my hand, be my guide, my strength, my everything and accomplish your will not mine. I give you all the glory, honor and praise. Amen.”




Have I ever told you how much I love that man?